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“Investing in a Better You…” Or Not.

July 1, 2014

I’m friends with several life coaches-to-others and a few that are life coaches just for themselves (their own cheerleaders). This means that among the funny animal videos and FAIL videos on Facebook, I get a steady stream of Self-Empowerment memes and life coach promotions to “Invest in Yourself.”

And I think, “meh.”

Not that there’s anything wrong with it, of course.  I have friends in therapy “working on themselves” and it is needed, glorious and right to do.

But there’s this thing about me I can’t shake.  I hate self-promotion (which is amazing considering how selfish I am).  Despite being too focused on myself, I truly dislike the “focus on yourself” message.  Part of it is my current season in life being the paycheck for my family. I don’t have time for all the “build a better you” process flows, let alone the will.

So I have this other friend, Darin Slack, premier football coach and all-around intense guy.  He wrote the first draft of a book and distributed it to friends who, not understanding what a first draft is, treated like it was the final draft.  Discouraging feedback for Darin, but I LOVED it.  I immediately saw it was for people like me in the head-down-work-till-your-butt-falls-off-mode-because-your-family-needs-you phase of life.  Which is a lot of 40-50 year old guys.  His message wasn’t the usual sunshine and bunnies self-help book, it was a book helping people in the gulf years of their lives understand why it’s a vital season and how you should look at it.

It was (rough draft-style) Truth to me. My dislike for self-help books of the sunshine and bunnies tribe stems from the fact that sunshine gives you skin cancer and bunnies are killed and eaten by a lot of people, but is that reflected in such books? “We’re going to help you make things better!” while Darin’s was “We’re going to discuss why the pain, sweat, blood and dreck of your life matters.”

I can get behind that.  There’s a word for it, too, and that word is… Darin’s to tell you.

Darin is a man of many, many ideas and vast knowledge. Maybe he’ll come back to that book someday. Now he’s working on others, and a business, and a family… he’s in those gulf years too, you see.

I’m sharing this with you today, because the first six posts I saw on Facebook this morning were self-help memes.  Those always make me think of Darin and his single-word message. So now you can think of Darin… and maybe he’ll let you know the word. 🙂

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